Jealousy. It’s an ugly thing. I’ve had my share on both sides of it. I’ve also learned to control and conquer it at times. But conquering it changes its configuration…it puts you on the other side of the spectrum, where you are the target of someone else’s jealousy. I remember being the target a long, long time ago, back when I was young and carefree and didn’t care if you liked me or not. I can’t say for sure anyone has been jealous of me since. But now the monster has resurfaced via a dear friend. I have a remarkable guy friend who has helped me through a lot. Now it seems the tables are turned and he is the one in need – woman troubles. The problem? Me. How dare he be friends with a woman. How dare we share social media websites. How dare I use my freedom of speech to comment on my friend’s posts. Seriously? Grow up. Yes, it makes me angry that someone else is trying to control me via hurting my friend. Furious actually.
So I sit here and reflect. Do I let an outside party run my life to keep things peaceful for my dear friend? Or do I stand up and say F**K you, I can do what I wish. I’m a Sagittarius, and Sagittarians won’t be controlled. I never have been, never will be. Not when I was in middle school and my friends tried to get me to smoke because they thought it was cool. Not in high school when they wanted me to do drugs because they all were. Not when my dates wanted me to have sex before I was ready just because it would make me a prude not too. Nope, no one has ever controlled me. Therefore, I am strongly inclined to go with the second route. But then there is the other side. The compassionate side. The one that would do anything for the people I love. The one who doesn’t want to see them hurt.
Jealousy. It’s a power trip. One trying to gain power over another. Instead of trying to exert that power, why not focus it inward and claim your own power. Be confident in who you are and realize that confidence is more powerful than jealousy.
Which side will win?